Holy Lord, another year has passed. Life is extremely short. Today the weather was beautiful. I closed my eyes in the sunshine and cool breeze. It had been years since I did that. Lisa and I langoured on beach chairs by the Thompson River. For me, I was recouperating. The cold medicine was making me dizzy. I know these lazy feelings will pass with the holiday. But with her there seems no hope. She is sorrowful about her loss of energy, which she believes is going to be permanent. I have run out of words to encourage her with. She feels old. She feels she's reached a plateau in her healing. I took her back into the house and just held her in my arms. You were there in the warmth of that love. Aging is not a thing I can argue with. Death is a blessing to those who need rebirth. You will tie everything together for good. I thank you for making death slow so that I can contemplate it and gain perspective before I meet you face to face. The early church fathers extol contemplation of death as a means to purity of heart. Ill health is thus a blessing, as are many means of sorrow.

I thought about ThePerfect Storm. How George Clooney dies. I thought about the Titanic. Captains going down with their ships. And I think about how quickly life passes. I think about the fact that we only have one chance at life. As we sat on our beach chairs by the river I saw a couple playing racquet ball. That was the way they wanted to spend their life. Whereas I was recouperating through rest, they were wearying themselves through exersize. Lord, I want my life to be useful to you. Don't let me waste it. Don't let me take another stupid path. I only have a few years left here. Be pleased with my life, Lord God. Show me the way.